Sunday, August 7, 2011

A letter for the creative soul..

Well in light of recent events, my 'thinking cap' has ...well....been working overtime. So I have come to a conclusion....I must write a letter! A letter of awareness + truth.
Well there comes a time when your daydreams finally become your life:: you can suck up all your insecurities + fears and just totally put yourself out there....and the thing that you put out there most is YOU, (it kinda feels like ya naked I guess..in a funny kind of way!) for all the world to see and judge. It keeps you awake at night, and it drives you to get up in the morning. You push yourself harder than ever imagined and you ride a bigger rollercoaster of emotion than when you were a teenage girl (which for me....well let’s just say it the ride was CRA to the Z!) BUT all in all you have finally reached that point of success (which for me, is not a monetary value) and fulfilment and most of all proud to be yourself!! And when peeps start lovin your dream...well it’s the bestest feeling ever (kinda reinforces you that you are not completely insane!!)

Now what if someone else decides that your dream looks pretty tasty??
Well your still standing there naked aren't ya::giggle!
I guess you are never prepared for what it feels like - Someone has tried to steal your Creative Soul and take the credit for it, even tho its 150% YOU sitting right there.... BUT what I have realized in life....is people are going to do what they are going to do + they can convince themselves that they are right +true...... even if it means hurting others to make themselves feel happy (which i'm pretty sure...i'm not innocent of in this life time).


So what are the side effects of someone Xeroxing your Creative Soul:::
1) You stay awake for long hours, which makes you a) crazy, b) angry c) irrational d) angry
2) You draft letters with words of the criminally insane
3) You take all your frustration out on your cute lil Beau who has done nothing but support you
4) You have a little cry in the supermarket, isle 5...but pretend its allergies
5)your family, besties and biggest supporters become outraged - because they too have been riding this bloody rollercoaster with ya for the last 8 years, so they are involved totally on the journey until the ride stops!!
5) You try very very very hard to pretend it doesn't hurt like fucking hell


So what is the Medication::
Well finally after a few weeks of constant self counselling and eating copious amounts of ice cream...........all i've got to say is: you can carbon copy my Creative Soul, change it by a millimetre here, and centimetre there to call it your own....but you will always be missing the secret ingredient:



And that would be ME! (i thought i would use the most cheeriest photo ever!!)
Bye bye for now
lil jj
Life Lesson 741:: Thru Stress comes Strength!!

2 comments:

  1. jj...you're awesome. I love your vent and I know you're creativity is something that cannot be copied. Go. Create. Be well! :)

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  2. You are amazingly creative and you are right no one can copy you!! I love your work but YOU are truly the magic behind it all!! Hugs and may all copies of you get a good swift kick in the butt! ;)
    I hope my brother has been good to you through out it all. xo

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